Expensive Weddings Are a Waste of Money

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It's About You; Not the Guests

One of the largest expenses a couple will incur is also their first: a lavish wedding that most people really cannot afford. While it may seem like a good way to celebrate the marriage, it is in reality a display of pride and arrogance. At a time when the emphasis should be on what the future husband and wife plan on doing for each other, it now becomes a ritualistic display of what they can do to impress others. Since this gaudy display is put on for the benefit of the guests and not the couple, the audience becomes the focal point, and the bride and groom are relegated to the backseat. When a couple spends an exorbitant amount of money on their wedding, they run the risk of starting their marriage out so far in debt that it is nearly impossible to dig themselves out. This in turn leads to financial difficulties that can haunt them for many years. Consequently, if the situation isn’t corrected early (which in most cases it isn’t) the end result is often divorce, which in itself leads to more financial problems.

It's About You; Not the Parents

In a story detailed on the Reuters website, a young 24 year old Rafi Kazimi fell to pressure from friends and family when he married his fiancée Farima, 20, by spending $10,000 on their wedding. After paying back only $4,000 of the loan to the bank, Rafi lost his job. Now he, his wife, and several other family members must rely on his older brother’s salary of $410 a month; $300 of which goes to pay the bank loan.
“It was too much,” Kazimi said of the money spent on his marriage to his first cousin. “I was so worried about how to find this money. Her parents didn’t care if I had the money or not, they just said we must have a big wedding.” (Nichols, 2011)
A good rule of thumb to always follow is to never let other people tell you how to spend your money. Perhaps if they are so concerned with you having something, then maybe they should pay for it.

It's About You; Not the Wedding Industry

In her book One Perfect Day: The Selling of the American Wedding, Rebecca Mead explains how those in the wedding industry encourage couples to spend outrageous sums of money; convincing them that this is the norm in today’s society. They encourage them to dole out large amounts of time and money on a day that passes just like all others; never encouraging them to nurture those things that will give them the gift of an enduring marriage. While many will say that expensive weddings are a perfect way to celebrate the beginning of a new life together, it is really more akin to a sports team celebrating a championship before the season begins. Perhaps instead of spending outlandish amounts of money on the wedding, the big lavish celebration should instead be held on a couple’s 50th wedding anniversary.

References
Nichols, M. (2011, January). Afghan government plans extravagant wedding ban. Retrieved from https://www.reuters.com/article/us-afghanistan-weddings/afghan-government- plans-extravagant-wedding-ban-idUSTRE7040Z520110105

© 2018 Stephen Moore

Comments

  1. UnknownOctober 2, 2018 at 6:29 PM

    I fully agree. When I worked at Adela's Flowers, she told me she expected payment for half the cost of the entire wedding order before she would order anything. Then she had to have full payment for the rest of the order before she would deliver anything to the church. It was the same way with funerals. Then she didn't have to send a bill and be told they couldn't pay. "You took advantage of us". When i bought her shop, i remembered her words.

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